I'm the spouse who is bad with money in terms of saving surplus, a condition for which we haven't suffered since our bills/income ratio is in our favor. My wife feels guilty about "treating" herself to this miracle shower spray that stops soap scum, or buying something like new socks.
Anyway, it's not "his" money nor is it "your" (singular) money. It's your (plural) money in order to do necessary things. That you aren't the "breadwinner" is immaterial if he is violating his duties as a husband and (?) father.
If your husband is taking bill money and putting it towards luxuries, that's a real problem and needs to be addressed.
If he just simply has a "ooh, shiny!"' complex, that should also be addressed.
Diaduit is right: you need to have a budget to make sure all needs are covered first.
What has been helpful for me is to self-limit an "allowance". If I want more money for something, I have to generate it via selling something else I have.
ETA: All the truly rich people I know are completely cheap. I know one guy who is a retired fiber optics architect for AT&T. Dude's worth over a million dollars from investments. Drives a cheap car. Works on his own vehicles. Pays for everything in cash and if he can't pay outright he doesn't buy it. Luxurious spending is the hallmark of the constantly self-impoverished and nouveau riche (and soon to be poor again).
