Author Topic: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.  (Read 2073 times)

Offline drummerboy

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #15 on: January 01, 2018, 11:00:53 AM »
Is he wearing a rainbow sash,? or just dressing like millennials, which looks pretty gay?  Clothing in this day and age is a real slippery slope
 
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Offline dymphnaw

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #16 on: January 01, 2018, 11:07:12 AM »
Wait a minute. You don't like the guy's clothes so you've decided that he must be gay?
 
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Offline ServusMariae

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #17 on: January 01, 2018, 11:51:12 AM »
I think upon the creation of this thread Martin may have seen that person wearing a shirt with LGBT symbolism or one which explicitly implies the person being "gay". If such is the case he has every reason to be deeply worried, yet I wouldn't judge the situation based on clothing alone.

Tell us, Martin: aside from the clothes, has this person ever willfully & explicitly claimed that he was "gay"? Was that clothing desperately selected because he had no more clothes to wear on that day, or did he select that shirt deliberately because of its message?  (silliest question ever but hope it helps to clarify things a bit first. :P )
« Last Edit: January 01, 2018, 11:53:51 AM by ServusMariae »
 

Offline martin88nyc

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #18 on: January 01, 2018, 12:22:15 PM »
Wait a minute. You don't like the guy's clothes so you've decided that he must be gay?
It is complicated. I cannot disclose more information because I just want I know what the moral thelogy tells us in situations like this. I have not seen his clothes that day because I was is sick. However one of the parishioners was shocked when he saw the guy and after mass reported it to our priest. Please don't accuse me of spitefulness or ill-will. I don't what to smear his that person's reputation, I just want to know if I should feel duty bound if he ever comes to church dressed like that again.
"These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you shall have distress: but have confidence, I have overcome the world." John 16:33
 

Offline dymphnaw

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #19 on: January 02, 2018, 07:10:16 AM »
Unless he tells you to your face that he is gay  or YOU see him dressed like a drag queen there is nothing for you to do except be civil.
 
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Offline Greg

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #20 on: January 02, 2018, 01:19:23 PM »
Do you live in a gun free state?
 

Offline martin88nyc

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #21 on: January 02, 2018, 02:14:26 PM »
Do you live in a gun free state?
New York. Professional slingshot is the most you can get here.
"These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you shall have distress: but have confidence, I have overcome the world." John 16:33
 

Offline martin88nyc

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #22 on: January 02, 2018, 02:15:59 PM »
Unless he tells you to your face that he is gay  or YOU see him dressed like a drag queen there is nothing for you to do except be civil.
This is what I thought. I am now at peace. Thank you.
PS: I hope he is not gay.
"These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you shall have distress: but have confidence, I have overcome the world." John 16:33
 

Offline Adrianus

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #23 on: January 05, 2018, 06:49:37 AM »
I think it's not good to jump to conclusions and spread these rumours. You could make life very hard for this man in this parish, and you don't even know if he's gay.

Als I believe that shunning the gay people is wrong. They are part of your parish, you should help them. Of course that's the job of the priest, but it's also our jobs as laymen to help our brothers and sisters. If someone is truggling with homosexual feelings, there is no reason why we can't listen to their story and offer help and prayers.

My priest and I talked about a family member being gay and me not being sure what to do with it. We decided it was best to keep normal contact. He knows I'm against his relationship, but that doesn't matter. I am the only Catholic person in his life. The LGBT-community often is poisonous for one's belief in God. If there is nothing to counter that he will never get out. There is a difference in having contact with a gay person and participating or condoning the LBGT community.
 
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Offline martin88nyc

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #24 on: January 05, 2018, 01:01:21 PM »
I think it's not good to jump to conclusions and spread these rumours. You could make life very hard for this man in this parish, and you don't even know if he's gay.

Als I believe that shunning the gay people is wrong. They are part of your parish, you should help them. Of course that's the job of the priest, but it's also our jobs as laymen to help our brothers and sisters. If someone is truggling with homosexual feelings, there is no reason why we can't listen to their story and offer help and prayers.

My priest and I talked about a family member being gay and me not being sure what to do with it. We decided it was best to keep normal contact. He knows I'm against his relationship, but that doesn't matter. I am the only Catholic person in his life. The LGBT-community often is poisonous for one's belief in God. If there is nothing to counter that he will never get out. There is a difference in having contact with a gay person and participating or condoning the LBGT community.
I haven't talked about this with anybody except my mother and father and our Priest. Perhaps I shouldn't have brought up this issue here but I wanted to know what my responsibilities should be in a situation like this. Trust me this is not easy for me.
"These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you shall have distress: but have confidence, I have overcome the world." John 16:33
 

Offline dymphnaw

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #25 on: January 05, 2018, 06:06:28 PM »
You have no responsibility at all. Unless he tells you point blank that he's gay be civil. You didn't even see him yourself. Why get worked up over this?
 

Offline martin88nyc

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #26 on: January 05, 2018, 06:34:49 PM »
You have no responsibility at all. Unless he tells you point blank that he's gay be civil. You didn't even see him yourself. Why get worked up over this?
You are right. There is no need to get worked up over this. This is really not my problem. I guess we should end this thread here.
"These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you shall have distress: but have confidence, I have overcome the world." John 16:33
 

Offline bigbadtrad

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Re: What to do when someone in the parish "comes out" as gay.
« Reply #27 on: January 05, 2018, 09:52:11 PM »
Your responsibility is the same for anyone who tries to corrupt the church. You see something potentially wrong, and want advice how to potentially fix it as you see it potentially corrupting others and you want to be a person who actually believes in the Church Militant.

1st I said you should speak to the person and get him to admit it somehow with a "Hey do you have a girlfriend?" or "When you wore that X a few weeks back where did you get that from?" This isn't 1980, he'll tell you if he's a fag with a long enough conversation if you ask the right questions and he'll almost be waiting to tell you. If he doesn't walk away and just realize younger people don't see effeminacy like you might. You should investigate regardless.

If he is tell him he's not invited and then get a friend to help him know heís not welcome. Make it very very clear.

Someone said  you shouldnít shun a homosexual in a church? Have you lost your mind? Donít you know a little leaven corrupts the whole, but a flamer is not a little leaven, itís a truck load with dynamite amount of leaven who is highly narcissistic and looking to corrupt with a flamethrower.

How about donít walk with those who donít follow our traditions by St. Paul?

Iím really seeing for the first time how much the gay lobby has affected even ďtraditionalistsĒ in this thread.

Even if the dude is not a homo but highly metrosexual and effeminate why in the world should that be allowed to be such a disgusting example?

Either you people donít have kids or you donít understand how life works. Itís one thing to see the fag on the street where your kids know they ďdonít get itĒ itís a different story when they think this is permitted. Kids look for hypocrisy. Fags will be one of those things they will use against us: ďWell youíre nice to John and he wears make-up.Ē

Have you people lost your mind with worldly advice and not what saints have said about dealing homosexuals and the effeminate? This is insanity.

 
"God has proved his love to us by laying down his life for our sakes; we too must be ready to lay down our lives for the sake of our brethren." 1 John 3:16
 
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