"Easter duty"

[Miriam_M]

masses for the gift of tears.  Iim sure that must only apply to the womenfolk

No it does not apply just to women.  Men can have the gift of tears, and have had them.  Just know that it is a gift -- a grace.  It is not a requirement for sufficient sorrow, such that if you don't experience that, you are supposedly not sorrowful enough.  It is actually considered a consolation, and consolations are merely gratuitous from God; they are by no means essential for the sanctifying grace of the sacrament.