Confession Grumpiness

[Sockpuppet]

You have lines outside the Confessional?

Think I would much rather prefer that than the total lack of people seeking the Sacrament of Penance, to a point the Priest forgets to show up because no one is going to be there anyway, which is the only situation where I have to wait to make my confession.

There were like 30 people turned away at the end. And they had 2 priests going.

[Sockpuppet]

There is simply no way a person can list off fifteen minutes of sins if they're going to Mass regularly.  Even the most scrupulous would have a hard time doing so. 

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I disagree. You can be a horrible sinner and still attend mass. Chris Farley attended mass religiously even though he was a notorious sinner. Same for JFK. Prostitutes also regularly attended mass in past ages.

It's a problem that now the assumption is if you're a sinner you shouldn't be at mass.

I get yoour point that 80-year old Gladis probably shouldn't be in there constantly and for long stretches of time.

But it seems like there should be more time set aside for confession by priests if so many people are getting turned away.

[Irishcyclist]

This may seem uncharitable, but that is not my intention.

I do notice that the longer confession duration time for older penitents, at confession.
I am assuming that these penitents use the opportunity of confession to speak to the priest about other issues, not directly connected to their making their confession. It might be the case that these people are lonely and perhaps the priest is the only other person they will have a chance to speak with?

We need to be more charitable here.

[Gardener]

There's nothing charitable about people who go to Mass daily, or at least multiple times in a week, and thus have access to Confession at that rate, holding people up who don't have that level of access because a) they're scrupulous and/or b) they want to chat about things that are not directly of themselves accusations against themselves for a sin.

I wonder if it's like this, frankly:

[Greg]

There is simply no way a person can list off fifteen minutes of sins if they're going to Mass regularly.  Even the most scrupulous would have a hard time doing so. 

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I disagree. You can be a horrible sinner and still attend mass. Chris Farley attended mass religiously even though he was a notorious sinner. Same for JFK. Prostitutes also regularly attended mass in past ages.

It's a problem that now the assumption is if you're a sinner you shouldn't be at mass.

I get yoour point that 80-year old Gladis probably shouldn't be in there constantly and for long stretches of time.

But it seems like there should be more time set aside for confession by priests if so many people are getting turned away.

You shouldn't even be in the confessional without a firm purpose of amendment.  So a prostitute is abusing the sacrament by going confession knowing full well she will be on a street corner 1 day later.

[Kaesekopf]

There is simply no way a person can list off fifteen minutes of sins if they're going to Mass regularly.  Even the most scrupulous would have a hard time doing so. 

Sent from my STV100-1 using Tapatalk

I disagree. You can be a horrible sinner and still attend mass. Chris Farley attended mass religiously even though he was a notorious sinner. Same for JFK. Prostitutes also regularly attended mass in past ages.

It's a problem that now the assumption is if you're a sinner you shouldn't be at mass.

I get yoour point that 80-year old Gladis probably shouldn't be in there constantly and for long stretches of time.

But it seems like there should be more time set aside for confession by priests if so many people are getting turned away.

I wholeheartedly agree with you, but I've seen old ladies in the box for 10-15 minutes consistently.  Even if you were a horrid degenerate, fifteen minutes of rattling off sins is...  a long time!

[james03]

My common thought temptation: "What the f**k?  Is this dude an axe murderer?  I wonder where the bodies are buried."

The worst are latino women.  I think they chat.  "So Father, how was your vacation?  Have you talked to your mother recently?".

And yes, I've had priests preach from the pulpit to knock it off.  Even if you have horrible sins, how long does it take to list the sin?  I think the piece people are missing:  if Father needs more information, he'll ask you.  And if he doesn't ask, it is probably because he is an expert that has heard 100,000 sins confessed.  State your sins and listen to Father.  5 minutes tops.  For most people, 2 minutes.

[Non Nobis]

Quick confession:  "These are my sins -- You know who I am Father, I know you do! They're  all the same sins as last time!"

[Greg]

Good thing I don't have scruples.


"1982 Ford Escort XR3i, glove box held closed with a popsicle stick and Gorilla glue Father.  1984 Golf GTi, customer asked me why exhaust was noisy, told him it was a "sports exhaust"....

5 hours later.  "Well my son say 500 Hail Marys for each of the cars you sold"


"Wait, wait Father I just thought of another one.  I sold an Austin Allegro to a Freemason"

"Deinde, ego te absolvo a peccatis tuis in nomine..."

[Miriam_M]

Look, even if Gardener, KK, and James are all 100% correct in their hypothesis that there is no "need" for more than 2-5 minutes in the confessional, for "regular [especially weekday] Mass attendees"  --a hypothesis that is still a guess-- the fact remains that ultimately the priest is capable of exercising some leadership (re-direction) in this regard.  Of course anyone in his position would prefer not to have to exercise it, and would prefer, through encouragement and teaching, to persuade penitents to be conscious and responsible about the use of the sacrament.  Yes, he doesn't want to get tough, but sometimes priests have to get tough on any number of matters.  In the interest of serving all of his flock and not the same few for a single sacrament (if that is true), and if catechesis has failed to make an impression, he is capable of redirecting at least one of any three penitents in question.  Not every penitent has the same supposedly obstinate or supposedly crafty or supposedly manipulative personality or behavior which escapes the ability of a confident, trained priest to curb.  Surely every third penitent or so, and especially if they are repeaters, can be controlled to some degree.

[Adrianus]

Quick confession:  "These are my sins -- You know who I am Father, I know you do! They're  all the same sins as last time!"

I once told my confessor: "I feel guilty of doing this because I sinned the same since since my last confession."
He responded with: "Gods forgiveness and the absolution haven't changed since." And then he proceeded to give me absolution.

[Prayerful]

The priest (a trained architect) who hears most Confessions before Sunday High Mass stays until the people's Communion, and then returns to the Confessional. I've never seen him offer Mass there. During a meeting on planned works there (to be carried out in 400k chunks section by section), he did ask if the Confessionals could be made warmer, and more soundproof (possible with cork wood according to the architects). I'd certainly have no interest in hearing people go on and on while waiting.

While waiting, most stuff can be classed under a few headings with frequency, and maybe framed by which of the Ten Commandments it comes under, which is a great way to filter out venial sins. Alternatively I make my confessions to the parish priest before he offers Saturday morning Low Mass. Usually on Saturday morning, I'm the only one, except some old lady who also doesn't slow up things. PP does a time efficient Low Mass, half an hour all included, very fine Latin pronunciation. I think young women and certain young men can be the slowest. The parish priest answers any queries via email, and he can be asked in person.

[Irishcyclist]

There is simply no way a person can list off fifteen minutes of sins if they're going to Mass regularly.  Even the most scrupulous would have a hard time doing so. 

Sent from my STV100-1 using Tapatalk

I disagree. You can be a horrible sinner and still attend mass. Chris Farley attended mass religiously even though he was a notorious sinner. Same for JFK. Prostitutes also regularly attended mass in past ages.

It's a problem that now the assumption is if you're a sinner you shouldn't be at mass.

I get yoour point that 80-year old Gladis probably shouldn't be in there constantly and for long stretches of time.

But it seems like there should be more time set aside for confession by priests if so many people are getting turned away.

You shouldn't even be in the confessional without a firm purpose of amendment.  So a prostitute is abusing the sacrament by going confession knowing full well she will be on a street corner 1 day later.

I agree that the penitent should possess a firm purpose of amendment. And I presume that a person attending confession does so because they are (i) guilty for the sins committed (ii) seeking absolution for their sins. Especially so where mortal sins are concerned.

If the prostitute is outside "working" the next day, then it is between her and her Maker to judge her interior motive for attending confession the previous day. Certainly confession should not be judged to be a licence to engage in further immoral behaviour.

[dymphna17]

Miriam makes a good point.  Priests are, when all is said and done, the true arbiters of how long someone takes during confession.  Our Priests know that even with confessions given as often as they are for as many people as we are, they are going to be there for at least a couple of hours during the week.  Sundays are different because we get alot of people from out of town.  We've even had our Rector say from the pulpit that Sunday confessions are for those from out of town.  That calmed it down for a bit, but not very long.  He also had to come out in defense of a certain Priest we had who would stay for a very long time after Mass.  In that case he had to finally send the head usher to go tell people in line that the person in there was to be the last for Fr G.

[Miriam_M]

The one aspect in which I find agreement with those lamenting (supposed) over-use of the confessional is that weekly confession for venial sins is not essential and is likely to overtax priests.  I have discussed this several times with my spiritual director.  We should not use the sacrament merely to avoid temptation because it is just as helpful to pray properly against temptation. If we are praying as we should, daily, and to fortify ourselves against temptation of our most repeated sins, that should be sufficient.  The subject came up because I asked him about it relative to my own needs, and he corrected me.

So, there are people who will abuse the generosity of the priest in his availability -- particularly in those parishes where faithful and giving priests do make themselves abundantly available for confession.  And separately there are people who mistakenly believe that because they (and I) are attached to our venial sins, we should confess them every week.  A convert friend of mine had been in the habit of assuming she should go to confession before every weekly HC -- or at least she should go if confession was available.  I had to explain to her that it wasn't necessary unless she truly was bothered by a sin, and especially if she thought it might be mortal and needed moral counseling about that particular sin weighing on her conscience.

Also, we do not confess mere faults, such as personality defects, that do not rise to the level of an offense against others and God.  But some people believe we should use the confessional for that, also.

Therefore, even though priests may preach from the pulpit about the penitent's brevity, he may or may not have also been clear about some of these above distinctions.  Merely pleading for brevity does not necessarily dissuade.  In addition, anyone who is a clever communicator should develop a pre-announced "code" for the other person to understand.  Thus, a priest could say from the pulpit, "If I remind you in the confessional that what you are confessing is a fault instead of a sin, receive that as a sign that you may be overusing the sacrament and denying someone else a more urgent need."    And as my own spiritual director said, abusing a sacrament is a serious sin.  That is something also that can be preached from the pulpit.

Catechesis about the above, and about the different uses of:
confession
spiritual direction
daily prayer/devotion

as well as leadership and follow-through.