Does anyone else find it difficult to pray?

[Bataar]

I'm not trying to be offensive or attack anyone or anything, especially Holy Mother Church, but I'm just wondering if anyone else struggles to pray? For me it just seems pointless and meaningless. I know some people get some kind of satisfaction or comfort from praying but for me, it seems as meaningful as just talking to myself. My prayers don't ever seem to have any positive outcome in any way.

I remember having a temp/contract job and learning that there was a good chance of getting hired on full time. I did a lot of praying and novenas for the intention of getting hired full time. Instead, the project I was on got canceled and not only did I not get hired on full time, I lost the contract job I had.

I've always been kind of a social loner, and there was time I only had a couple of friends so I really started to pray that God would help me make more friends. Instead, the couple of friends I did have ended up moving away in short order and not only did I not make more friends, but I lost the ones I had.

Things like this happen all the time for me. Things like praying to meet a single, Catholic woman only to finally meet a young, Catholic lady and after hitting things off with her and just as I was thinking this might go to the next level, she had to move across the country to help with a family issue only to lose all contact.

Having a job interview scheduled and praying that it goes well only to have the interview canceled altogether.

I honestly remember, back in 2012, praying a Rosary and one of my intentions was for Mitt Romney to win the presidential election. I honestly remember thinking that if I wanted Romney to win, I should pray for Obama to win. Way back then I remember humorously thinking that. There are times when someone will ask me to pray for them or for some intention and the first think I think of is that they really don't want me praying for them.

Again, I know this is all just perception, but it does make maintaining a prayer life very, very hard.

[Maximilian]

I'm just wondering if anyone else struggles to pray?

To chip in my two cents worth, "No," I don't struggle to pray. I find it the most rewarding, as well as the most natural part of the day. "Natural," in the sense of it feels like this is what I should be doing, and I wonder how I manage to waste so many hours of the day doing other stuff.

For me it just seems pointless and meaningless. I know some people get some kind of satisfaction or comfort from praying but for me, it seems as meaningful as just talking to myself.

Yes, good point, perhaps you are talking to yourself. Aren't we all talking to ourselves most of the time?
  - During coffee after Mass, are we talking to ourselves or do we really pay attention to what the other person is saying?
  - At work do we really care about the other person, or are we just talking to ourselves?
  - In our families, do we really hear the other people, or are we just talking to ourselves?

My prayers don't ever seem to have any positive outcome in any way.

Your entire concept of prayer is completely mistaken. This is an honest question and not rhetorical, "Are you aware that your statements are taken virtually word-for-word from Mark Twain?" Mark Twain put these exact words into the mouth of Huck Finn. One should be aware that Mark Twain was a famous Masonic propagandist, and his character Huck Finn is a cheerfully naive atheist.

I remember having a temp/contract job and learning that there was a good chance of getting hired on full time. I did a lot of praying and novenas for the intention of getting hired full time. Instead, the project I was on got canceled and not only did I not get hired on full time, I lost the contract job I had.
etc. etc. etc.

Prayer worked out in a similar way for Huck Finn.

I honestly remember, back in 2012, praying a Rosary and one of my intentions was for Mitt Romney to win the presidential election. I honestly remember thinking that if I wanted Romney to win, I should pray for Obama to win.

As Garth Brooks sang, "Thank God for Unanswered Prayers."

https://youtu.be/q9Xawlq1-oE?si=93m3yMbF-u4IHzGr

Again, I know this is all just perception, but it does make maintaining a prayer life very, very hard.

It's not just perception, it's reality. What you call "prayer life" is just asking for things. It's just like a wife whose only perception of a "relationship" with her husband is asking him to buy her things. She asks him to buy her a mink coat, and if he says "Yes," then that was a successful relationship, but if he says "No," that was an unsuccessful relationship.

A woman says, "How can I maintain a relationship with this man when he refuses to buy me a mink coat every time I ask him?" You say the same thing about God.

Just like the wife, your job is to be a servant to your Lord. Be like Samuel who said, "Speak Lord, for your servant is listening." Or like Mary who said, "Behold, the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done unto me according to thy word."

In terms of the give-and-take relationship between you and God, God has already supplied:
 - The sun
 - The moon
 - The stars
 - The Earth
 - The waters
 - The air
 - The animals
 - The fruits and grains.
 - Your life
 - Your chance of salvation, won at the price of His own death on the Cross

And you, what you have supplied to God? What have you done in exchange? What does God owe you? According to your own description of your life -- absolutely nothing.

[diaduit]

It's not just perception, it's reality. What you call "prayer life" is just asking for things. It's just like a wife whose only perception of a "relationship" with her husband is asking him to buy her things. She asks him to buy her a mink coat, and if he says "Yes," then that was a successful relationship, but if he says "No," that was an unsuccessful relationship.

A woman says, "How can I maintain a relationship with this man when he refuses to buy me a mink coat every time I ask him?" You say the same thing about God.

Just like the wife, your job is to be a servant to your Lord. Be like Samuel who said, "Speak Lord, for your servant is listening." Or like Mary who said, "Behold, the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done unto me according to thy word."

In terms of the give-and-take relationship between you and God, God has already supplied:
 - The sun
 - The moon
 - The stars
 - The Earth
 - The waters
 - The air
 - The animals
 - The fruits and grains.
 - Your life
 - Your chance of salvation, won at the price of His own death on the Cross

And you, what you have supplied to God? What have you done in exchange? What does God owe you? According to your own description of your life -- absolutely nothing.

Amazingly well put Max.

[clau clau]

It's not just perception, it's reality. What you call "prayer life" is just asking for things. It's just like a wife whose only perception of a "relationship" with her husband is asking him to buy her things. She asks him to buy her a mink coat, and if he says "Yes," then that was a successful relationship, but if he says "No," that was an unsuccessful relationship.

A woman says, "How can I maintain a relationship with this man when he refuses to buy me a mink coat every time I ask him?" You say the same thing about God.

Just like the wife, your job is to be a servant to your Lord. Be like Samuel who said, "Speak Lord, for your servant is listening." Or like Mary who said, "Behold, the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done unto me according to thy word."

In terms of the give-and-take relationship between you and God, God has already supplied:
 - The sun
 - The moon
 - The stars
 - The Earth
 - The waters
 - The air
 - The animals
 - The fruits and grains.
 - Your life
 - Your chance of salvation, won at the price of His own death on the Cross

And you, what you have supplied to God? What have you done in exchange? What does God owe you? According to your own description of your life -- absolutely nothing.

Amazingly well put Max.

Agreed, that was fantastic.

[queen.saints]

This is exactly what the sermon last Sunday was about where we went to Mass.

The priest said that by virtue of being grafted on to the Body of Christ, the Church partakes of the graces therein and our prayers are efficacious. He said if our prayers aren't being answered, it's because we need to be more closely grafted onto Christ.

He said to take this opportunity to read the Imitation of Christ and also the life of St. Thérèse who had large parts of that book memorized by heart.


Jesus specifically instructed us to ask and told us we would receive when we did.

He said if you being evil still know how to give your children good things, doesn't your Heavenly Father know how to give good things to those who ask Him?

If Christ is the husband and the Church is the bride, then we see that all day everyday the Church is asking Christ for things and He always answers her prayers.



Now in the Octave of All Saints Day:

" Gradual: Psalms xxxiii. 10, 11

    Fear the Lord, all ye His saints; for there is no want to them that fear Him. ℣. But they that seek the Lord shall not be deprived of any good.

Alleluia: Matthew xi. 28

    Alleluia, alleluia. ℣. Come to Me all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will refresh you. Alleluia.


Postcommunion

Grant,we beseech Thee, O Lord, that Thy faithful people may always rejoice in paying reverence to all Thy saints, and may they be helped by their unceasing prayers. Through our Lord."

[queen.saints]

Catechism of the Council of Trent

"Our most bountiful Father wishes to be invoked by His children; He wishes that, praying as we ought each day of our lives, we may pray with increased confidence. He wishes that in obtaining our requests we may more and more bear witness to and declare His goodness towards us."

 

[This whole section of the Catechism is so good, but long, so here is just one section. There is another on how and what we should pray for that would also be useful.]


http://www.catholicapologetics.info/thechurch/catechism/TheLordsPrayer.shtml


" Those, therefore, who do not practice assiduous and regular prayer deprive themselves of a powerful means of obtaining gifts of singular value. To succeed in obtaining the object of your desires, it is not enough that you ask that which is good; your entreaties must also be assiduous. Every one that asketh, says St. Jerome, receiveth, as it is written. If, therefore, it is not given you, this is because you do not ask. Ask, therefore, and you shall receive."


" The Fruits of Prayer

Moreover, this necessity of prayer is also productive of the greatest delight and usefulness, since it bears most abundant fruits. When it is necessary to instruct the faithful concerning these fruits, pastors will find ample matter in sacred writers. We have made from these sources a selection which appeared to us to suit the present purpose.

Prayer Honours God

The first fruit which we receive is that by praying we honour God, since prayer is a certain act of religion, which is compared in Scripture to a sweet perfume. Let my prayer, says the Prophet, be directed as incense in thy sight. By prayer we confess our subjection to God; we acknowledge and proclaim Him to be the author of all good, in whom alone we center all our hopes, who alone is our refuge, in all dangers and the bulwark of our salvation. Of this fruit we are admonished also in these words: Call upon me in the day of trouble; I �will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.

Prayer Obtains What We Request

Another most pleasing and invaluable fruit of prayer is that it is heard by God. Prayer is the key of heaven, says St. Augustine; prayer ascends, and the mercy of God descends. High as are the heavens, and low as is the earth, God hears the voice of man. Such is the utility, such the efficacy of prayer, that through it we obtain a plenitude of heavenly gifts. Thus by prayer we secure the guidance and aid of the Holy Spirit, the security and preservation of the faith, deliverance from punishment, divine protection under temptation, victory over the devil. In a word, there is in prayer an accumulation of spiritual joy; and hence our Lord said: Ask, and you shall receive, that your joy may be full.

Proof

Nor can we, for a moment, doubt that God in His goodness awaits and is at all times ready to hear our petitions �� a truth to which the Sacred Scriptures bear ample testimony. Since, however, the texts are easy of access, we shall content ourselves with citing as an example the words of Isaias: Then shalt thou call, and the Lord will hear: thou shalt cry, and he will say, "Here I am"; and again, It shall come to pass, that before they call, I will hear: as they are yet speaking, I will hear. With regard to instances of persons, who have obtained from God the objects of their prayers, they are almost innumerable, and too well known to require special mention.

Unwise And Indevout Prayers Unheard

Sometimes, indeed, it happens that what we ask of God we do not obtain. But it is then especially that God looks to our welfare, either because He bestows on us other gifts of higher value and in greater abundance, or because what we ask, far from being necessary or useful, would prove superfluous and injurious. God, says St. Augustine, denies some things in His mercy which He grants in His wrath.

Sometimes, also, such is the remissness and negligence with which we pray, that we ourselves do not attend to what we say. Since prayer is an elevation of the soul to God, if, while we pray, the mind, instead of being fixed upon God, is distracted, and the tongue slurs over the words at random, without attention, without devotion, with what propriety can we give to such empty sounds the name of Christian prayer?

We should not, therefore, be at all surprised, if God does not comply with our requests; either because by our negligence and indifference we almost show that we do not really desire what we ask, or because we ask those things, which, if granted, would be prejudicial to our interests.

To Devout Prayer And Dispositions God Grants More Than Is Asked

On the other hand, to those who pray with devout attention, God grants more than they ask. This the Apostle declares in his Epistle to the Ephesians, and the same truth is unfolded ill the parable of the prodigal son, who would have deemed it a kindness to be admitted into the number of his father's servants.

Nay, God heaps His favours not only on those who seek them, but also on those who are rightly disposed; and this, not only with abundance, but also with readiness. This is shown by the words of Scripture: The Lord hath heard the desire of the poor. For God hastens to grant the inner and hidden desires of the needy without awaiting their utterance."

[Deirdre]

Which Catechism is this?

[queen.saints]

Which Catechism is this?

The Catechism of the Council of Trent.

Will edit to add! I'd thought it showed in the url, but it doesn't.

Here is a link to the table of contents:

http://www.catholicapologetics.info/thechurch/catechism/trentc.htm

[Deirdre]

I don't pray for specific things to happen. Instead, I pray that God's will be done, and that I may have fortitude in accepting it. And I pray for other virtues.
Edit: I did pray that my grandma be reconciled to the Church before she died (she was), and offered sacrifices for this intention. And I pray for my aunt to have relief when she's in pain. But not for specific things for myself.

[queen.saints]

I don't pray for specific things to happen. Instead, I pray that God's will be done, and that I may have fortitude in accepting it. And I pray for other virtues.
Edit: I did pray that my grandma be reconciled to the Church before she died (she was), and offered sacrifices for this intention. And I pray for my aunt to have relief when she's in pain. But not for specific things for myself.

That's so wonderful about your Grandma! Thanks be to God.

The catechism says that intercessory prayer is more pleasing to God than prayers for ourselves. 

[Bataar]

I'm just wondering if anyone else struggles to pray?

To chip in my two cents worth, "No," I don't struggle to pray. I find it the most rewarding, as well as the most natural part of the day. "Natural," in the sense of it feels like this is what I should be doing, and I wonder how I manage to waste so many hours of the day doing other stuff.

For me it just seems pointless and meaningless. I know some people get some kind of satisfaction or comfort from praying but for me, it seems as meaningful as just talking to myself.

Yes, good point, perhaps you are talking to yourself. Aren't we all talking to ourselves most of the time?
  - During coffee after Mass, are we talking to ourselves or do we really pay attention to what the other person is saying?
  - At work do we really care about the other person, or are we just talking to ourselves?
  - In our families, do we really hear the other people, or are we just talking to ourselves?

My prayers don't ever seem to have any positive outcome in any way.

Your entire concept of prayer is completely mistaken. This is an honest question and not rhetorical, "Are you aware that your statements are taken virtually word-for-word from Mark Twain?" Mark Twain put these exact words into the mouth of Huck Finn. One should be aware that Mark Twain was a famous Masonic propagandist, and his character Huck Finn is a cheerfully naive atheist.

I remember having a temp/contract job and learning that there was a good chance of getting hired on full time. I did a lot of praying and novenas for the intention of getting hired full time. Instead, the project I was on got canceled and not only did I not get hired on full time, I lost the contract job I had.
etc. etc. etc.

Prayer worked out in a similar way for Huck Finn.

I honestly remember, back in 2012, praying a Rosary and one of my intentions was for Mitt Romney to win the presidential election. I honestly remember thinking that if I wanted Romney to win, I should pray for Obama to win.

As Garth Brooks sang, "Thank God for Unanswered Prayers."

https://youtu.be/q9Xawlq1-oE?si=93m3yMbF-u4IHzGr

Again, I know this is all just perception, but it does make maintaining a prayer life very, very hard.

It's not just perception, it's reality. What you call "prayer life" is just asking for things. It's just like a wife whose only perception of a "relationship" with her husband is asking him to buy her things. She asks him to buy her a mink coat, and if he says "Yes," then that was a successful relationship, but if he says "No," that was an unsuccessful relationship.

A woman says, "How can I maintain a relationship with this man when he refuses to buy me a mink coat every time I ask him?" You say the same thing about God.

Just like the wife, your job is to be a servant to your Lord. Be like Samuel who said, "Speak Lord, for your servant is listening." Or like Mary who said, "Behold, the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done unto me according to thy word."

In terms of the give-and-take relationship between you and God, God has already supplied:
 - The sun
 - The moon
 - The stars
 - The Earth
 - The waters
 - The air
 - The animals
 - The fruits and grains.
 - Your life
 - Your chance of salvation, won at the price of His own death on the Cross

And you, what you have supplied to God? What have you done in exchange? What does God owe you? According to your own description of your life -- absolutely nothing.

Maybe my thinking is a little slow right now, but I don't really get most of this, especiallty your refrences to Huck Finn. When I pray my Rosary, it feels like a waste of time. I do it anyway, but this is what it feels like. Like I'm just talking to myself. When praying a Rosary, I always offer it for some personal intentions. In my mind, I know they won't be granted, but I do it anyway mainly because that's how I was taught and have done that since I was a little kid. It's just hard to pray when you feel like the results will be the same whether you pray the Rosary or watch TV. I don't know what to do change this. One of my intentions is to develop a stronger prayer life and grow closer to God, but again, this intention isn't granted and I'm not sure what to do.

[The Curt Jester]

Try adoration instead.  Petition type prayers are the lowest form of prayer because they are still focusing on us.  Adoration is purely about God.

[queen.saints]

When I pray my Rosary, it feels like a waste of time. I do it anyway, but this is what it feels like. Like I'm just talking to myself. When praying a Rosary, I always offer it for some personal intentions. In my mind, I know they won't be granted, but I do it anyway mainly because that's how I was taught and have done that since I was a little kid. It's just hard to pray when you feel like the results will be the same whether you pray the Rosary or watch TV. I don't know what to do change this. One of my intentions is to develop a stronger prayer life and grow closer to God, but again, this intention isn't granted and I'm not sure what to do.

https://scepterpublishers.org/blogs/scepter-blog-corner/14-rules-for-the-discernment-of-spirits-by-st-ignatius-of-loyola


"Fifth Rule. The fifth: In time of desolation never to make a change; but to be firm and constant in the resolutions and determination in which one was the day preceding such desolation, or in the determination in which he was in the preceding consolation. Because, as in consolation it is rather the good spirit who guides and counsels us, so in desolation it is the bad, with whose counsels we cannot take a course to decide rightly.

Sixth Rule. The sixth: Although in desolation we ought not to change our first resolutions, it is very helpful intensely to change ourselves against the same desolation, as by insisting more on prayer, meditation, on much examination, and by giving ourselves more scope in some suitable way of doing penance.


Seventh Rule. The seventh: Let him who is in desolation consider how the Lord has left him in trial in his natural powers, in order to resist the different agitations and temptations of the enemy; since he can with the Divine help, which always remains to him, though he does not clearly perceive it: because the Lord has taken from him his great fervor, great love and intense grace, leaving him, however, grace enough for eternal salvation.


Eighth Rule. The eighth: Let him who is in desolation labor to be in patience, which is contrary to the vexations which come to him: and let him think that he will soon be consoled, employing against the desolation the devices, as is said in the sixth Rule.


Ninth Rule. The ninth: There are three principal reasons why we find ourselves desolate.

The first is, because of our being tepid, lazy or negligent in our spiritual exercises; and so through our faults, spiritual consolation withdraws from us.

The second, to try us and see how much we are and how much we let ourselves out in His service and praise without such great pay of consolation and great graces.

The third, to give us true acquaintance and knowledge, that we may interiorly feel that it is not ours to get or keep great devotion, intense love, tears, or any other spiritual consolation, but that all is the gift and grace of God our Lord, and that we may not build a nest in a thing not ours, raising our intellect into some pride or vainglory, attributing to us devotion or the other things of the spiritual consolation."

[queen.saints]

Prayer


(Greek euchesthai, Latin precari, French prier, to plead, to beg, to ask earnestly).

An act of the virtue of religion which consists in asking proper gifts or graces from God. In a more general sense it is the application of the mind to Divine things, not merely to acquire a knowledge of them but to make use of such knowledge as a means of union with God. This may be done by acts of praise and thanksgiving, but petition is the principal act of prayer.


https://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12345b.htm#:~:text=An%20act%20of%20the%20virtue,means%20of%20union%20with%20God.

[benedicite]

Sometimes when God wants to lead someone to a greater holiness, He allows the soul to suffer particular difficulties in prayer. Do your best.