Question for the Ladies

Started by james03, May 29, 2021, 04:07:49 PM

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james03

Men, I request you avoid replying until there are 10 replies, and then it can be a free-for-all.

Here's the background and question.  I understand certain attractive characteristics for the ladies, as I've told my boys that if they want to succeed in that department, they should wear a Fedora and plaids from the 70's.  But in general, some of the characteristics include low trait neuroticism, having goals, fortitude and competence in executing particularly physical tasks, the list goes on.  And the secondary characteristics trace back to these basics.  A young man might be stumped at watching a girl get excited when a man goes by on a sports bike, expertly navigating the curves.  What she is interpreting is low trait neuroticism in the risk taking and his competent riding.  A man who is ripped is attractive because the female infers he can competently handle a physical challenger.  Here's what stumps me.

A subset of men are the artists.  Just look at females in the audience of a singer, and their eyes glaze over and they go into a trance.  My best explanation is emotional overload.  Any of you all want to explain the hyper attraction this causes?  Maybe he has a need to be fixed (and thus the emotional torment he displays in his songs.)?
"But he that doth not believe, is already judged: because he believeth not in the name of the only begotten Son of God (Jn 3:18)."

"All sorrow leads to the foot of the Cross.  Weep for your sins."

"Although He should kill me, I will trust in Him"

Elizabeth.2

Quote from: james03 on May 29, 2021, 04:07:49 PM


A subset of men are the artists. 

The young should go to that nice event that Kaese mentioned.  I think it's really soon in Denver or Colorado Springs.  There are lots of gifted musical families in our Traddom.   :patriot:

MundaCorMeum

#2
Fedora and 70s plaid, guys riding motorcycles, or super ripped guys are not really my style.  I'm being blunt for clarity's sake.  Honestly, really ripped guys gross me out.  Biker guys are ok, I guess.  And, fedoras and plaid don't match, and come across as trying too hard in the fashion department.  Personally, I prefer the ruggedly handsome type men.  Men who are strong not because they work out all the time or do macho things just to show off to the ladies (a la Gaston), but because they do strong physical things that naturally develop muscle, simply because it's masculine to do so: farmers, firemen, lumberjacks, guys that work in landscaping, carpenters...I'm most attracted to men who are masculine simply for the sake of being masculine; not men who try to be masculine because they want to impress chicks.  It's the men who are truly masculine and chivalrous/ gentlemanly, yet are somewhat unaware of it that are most attractive to women. 

Artistic men have a certain superficial attractiveness, because they come across as sensitive to who we are as women, and that they understand us and "get who we are".  But, it is like I said, superficial.  Let's be honest....any man who truly understands and "gets" what a woman is thinking/feeling is effiminate, and that will lose steam at some point, because women need more than that from men.

ETA: when I said "artistic men", I was meaning specifically the guys that James referred to....the ones that sing sappy pop songs, that all the teen girls faun over.  I'm not saying authentically masculine men shouldn't or can't have artistic talents.  They certainly can and should.  But, that quality is not the foundation for what makes a man a good man, nor is it the main quality that will sustain attraction and affection throughout a marriage.  It's the icing on the cake.  My husband is a very talented artist, and has got some great moves on the swing dance floor.  It does alot to enhance our relationship, but without it, he would still be incredibly attractive to me, and still meet all the qualities a woman wants/needs in a good husband and father. 

Fleur-de-Lys

Can you please rephrase the question, James? I'm having trouble focusing. My man is playing the guitar and singing in Spanish.  :swoon:

Jayne

The qualities that I find most attractive in a man are high intelligence and piety, which I found in my husband. He does happen to be very physically attractive, so that may have subconsciously influenced me, but I was not aware of it affecting me much.  He is not artistic or musical.  He is a stereotypical computer geek.  Nerds have always been my type.  I joined the chess club in high school, not out of any interest in chess, but because it was full of the sort of boys I liked.
Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto Thine.

MundaCorMeum

My husband was president of the chess club in high school, and also worked as a landscaper.  He's always been a devout Catholic, even when I wasn't.  I consider him the total package  ;D

Jayne

Quote from: MundaCorMeum on May 30, 2021, 06:49:25 AM
My husband was president of the chess club in high school, and also worked as a landscaper.  He's always been a devout Catholic, even when I wasn't.  I consider him the total package  ;D

It's starting to look like men ought to play chess if they want to attract women.  It gives a whole new meaning to "being a player."  :)
Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto Thine.

Fleur-de-Lys

I agree. I am primarily attracted to a man who is intelligent and cultured. But I also like a man who is uninhibited, sensual, and emotionally expressive. Artistic talent, especially musical talent, can showcase those qualities.

TheReturnofLive

Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 11:42:09 AM
I agree. I am primarily attracted to a man who is intelligent and cultured. But I also like a man who is uninhibited, sensual, and emotionally expressive. Artistic talent, especially musical talent, can showcase those qualities.

Well, I browse Reddit and 4chan, and am am high IQ enough to understand John Oliver's scathing socio-political commentary.

You better watch out, Vetus.
"The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but irrigate deserts." - C.S. Lewis

Fleur-de-Lys

Quote from: TheReturnofLive on May 30, 2021, 12:04:54 PM
Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 11:42:09 AM
I agree. I am primarily attracted to a man who is intelligent and cultured. But I also like a man who is uninhibited, sensual, and emotionally expressive. Artistic talent, especially musical talent, can showcase those qualities.

Well, I browse Reddit and 4chan, and am am high IQ enough to understand John Oliver's scathing socio-political commentary.

You better watch out, Vetus.

You're also impetuous and assertive. You don't abide by other men's rules. You rushed in before ten women had posted.

Lydia Purpuraria

Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 29, 2021, 09:15:34 PM
Can you please rephrase the question, James? I'm having trouble focusing. My man is playing the guitar and singing in Spanish.  :swoon:

:lol:

TheReturnofLive

Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 12:15:54 PM
Quote from: TheReturnofLive on May 30, 2021, 12:04:54 PM
Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 11:42:09 AM
I agree. I am primarily attracted to a man who is intelligent and cultured. But I also like a man who is uninhibited, sensual, and emotionally expressive. Artistic talent, especially musical talent, can showcase those qualities.

Well, I browse Reddit and 4chan, and am am high IQ enough to understand John Oliver's scathing socio-political commentary.

You better watch out, Vetus.

You're also impetuous and assertive. You don't abide by other men's rules. You rushed in before ten women had posted.

It depends. I interpreted as "replying" not as in "functional reply" but rather a reply to the inquiry, which I didn't.

But I am a rebel without a cause, so maybe you're right in my intention  ;)
"The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but irrigate deserts." - C.S. Lewis

Fleur-de-Lys

Quote from: TheReturnofLive on May 30, 2021, 12:40:28 PM
Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 12:15:54 PM
Quote from: TheReturnofLive on May 30, 2021, 12:04:54 PM
Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 11:42:09 AM
I agree. I am primarily attracted to a man who is intelligent and cultured. But I also like a man who is uninhibited, sensual, and emotionally expressive. Artistic talent, especially musical talent, can showcase those qualities.

Well, I browse Reddit and 4chan, and am am high IQ enough to understand John Oliver's scathing socio-political commentary.

You better watch out, Vetus.

You're also impetuous and assertive. You don't abide by other men's rules. You rushed in before ten women had posted.

It depends. I interpreted as "replying" not as in "functional reply" but rather a reply to the inquiry, which I didn't.

Never make excuses.

TheReturnofLive

Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 12:49:29 PM
Quote from: TheReturnofLive on May 30, 2021, 12:40:28 PM
Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 12:15:54 PM
Quote from: TheReturnofLive on May 30, 2021, 12:04:54 PM
Quote from: Fleur-de-Lys on May 30, 2021, 11:42:09 AM
I agree. I am primarily attracted to a man who is intelligent and cultured. But I also like a man who is uninhibited, sensual, and emotionally expressive. Artistic talent, especially musical talent, can showcase those qualities.

Well, I browse Reddit and 4chan, and am am high IQ enough to understand John Oliver's scathing socio-political commentary.

You better watch out, Vetus.

You're also impetuous and assertive. You don't abide by other men's rules. You rushed in before ten women had posted.

It depends. I interpreted as "replying" not as in "functional reply" but rather a reply to the inquiry, which I didn't.

Never make excuses.

I don't. Just being honest bro.

Done replying as to not derail this further
"The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but irrigate deserts." - C.S. Lewis

james03

QuoteThe young should go to that nice event that Kaese mentioned.  I think it's really soon in Denver or Colorado Springs.
K. took credit for finding this?  That rat.

Please note that none of the women answered the question.  The comedic post by Fluer was actually closest, at least admitting the attraction.  I'll restate it because I framed it wrong:  "Ladies, how would you explain the attraction by SOME women (we'll call them hussies) for artistic types?   Are they just looking for a fling?  The need to fix?  Emotional overload?"

Here's why I'm asking.  The worst thing you can be around women is sensitive and emotional.  I don't care what they SAY, it is a huge failure.  I'm talking about the general population.  EXCEPT this instance.  Perhaps they successfully combine a masculine visage with the emotional, so the girl can fantasize she can have her cake and eat it to?  I need this explained.

Also, for the record, the fedora and 70's plaid was a joke.  I guess I should stay away from comedy.
"But he that doth not believe, is already judged: because he believeth not in the name of the only begotten Son of God (Jn 3:18)."

"All sorrow leads to the foot of the Cross.  Weep for your sins."

"Although He should kill me, I will trust in Him"